


The Slap

by ang3lba3



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-22
Updated: 2014-08-22
Packaged: 2018-02-14 05:29:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2179701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ang3lba3/pseuds/ang3lba3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“So you know that kiss a stranger video?” Charlie asked, Gilda nodding excitedly over her shoulder.</p><p>“Yeah, you made me watch it.” Jo said slowly, unsure if she should be worried or pumped up.</p><p>“Well, how do you feel about slapping a stranger?”</p><p>Jo sat there for a moment, completely in shock by how very much she wanted to do that.</p><p>“Dude, yes.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Slap

“So you know that kiss a stranger video?” Charlie asked, Gilda nodding excitedly over her shoulder.

“Yeah, you made me watch it.” Jo said slowly, unsure if she should be worried or pumped up.

“Well, how do you feel about slapping a stranger?”

Jo sat there for a moment, completely in shock by how very much she wanted to do that.

“Dude, yes.”

-

“Dude, no.” Dean said firmly. “I have knocked people’s teeth out with a slap.”

“Stop bringing that up, it was one-”

“Three.”

“-time. And besides those were all in fights.”

“I don’t hit people unless I’m getting paid for it.” Dean said firmly.

Jo stared at him, amazed. “How did you say that with a straight face? The only person who gets in more bar fights is me.”

“Hey, I do get paid for those. In satisfaction.”

“I’ll buy you lunch.”

“Deal.”

 

-

Sam agreed easily, spouting off some stuff about what an interesting experiment it was. Gilda nodded along, agreed, and tried not to let on they were doing it because it would be hella.

-

They put up signs in the best coffee shops and courtyards, and people came. Not a lot, but the people who did promised to drag along their friends and family members.

-

The little smirking man had been spouting off innuendos and bad puns for what felt like  _hours_. His come hither smile and look was actually pretty convincing, but everything that came out of his mouth kind of canceled out the effect.

“-I’m Gabriel. What name will I be screaming later?”

“Hopefully not mine.” Sam answered dryly. He  _wasn’t_  attracted to this irritating, tiny, extremely inappropriate cherub. “I’m Sam.”

Gabe wiggled an eyebrow. “Sam, eh? Good, short name, very simple, easy to remember in the heat of the mo-”

Sam stared at his hand, almost confused. One second Gabe had been talking and the next he was rubbing his cheek with a betrayed look.

“Oh, it is on like you’ll be on me- hey!” Gabe shouted at the interruption of another slap and Sam shrugged helplessly.

He just liked him so much better when he wasn’t talking.

-

“Benny.”

“Garth! Pleasure to meet you.”

Garth enveloped Benny in a bear hug. There was a joke in there to be made about gay porn, and Charlie snickered from behind the camera for no apparent reason. Jo winked at her understandingly.

“So should I go first?” Garth asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet a little.

“Whatever floats your boat, brother.” Benny said, sagely. He existed in a state of wisdom inaccessible by the common man.

Garth reached out and gently patted Benny on the cheek. Benny nodded (also sagely) and slapped Garth so hard his baseball hat came off. Garth squeaked and slapped Benny back, this time with enough force that it actually made the smacking noise. An extremely dignified slap fight ensued.

-

“Bela.” the beautiful woman said. There was something distinctly sleazy about her, in the most gorgeous and stately way you could be sleazy.

Perhaps sleazy was the wrong word.

“Tessa.”

They nodded at each other respectfully. There was something creepy and deadly about Tessa, and Bela complimented it.

Behind the camera, Charlie tried desperately not to ship it.

-

Missouri looked unimpressed by Bobby’s gentle, respectful slap on the cheek. She raised an eyebrow, made a disapproving noise, and backhanded him so hard that his baseball bat fell - nay, flew - off his head and to the other side of the room.

Bobby’s receding hairline was suddenly and forcefully revealed to the light of day (studio), gleaming barren and pale.

-

Tessa grinned, slapping Bela again and again and again, three quick ones in succession. Bella grinned back, reaching her hands out to slap Tessa on both cheeks at once.

Charlie failed miserably at not shipping it.

-

“Dean.” Dean said informally, sticking out a hand to shake.

“I am Castiel.” the man replied very formally, staring at Dean’s hand until it got awkward and Dean just dropped it. At that point, Castiel seemed to remember what handshakes were and grabbed Dean’s hand before flopping it up and down.

“Awesome.” Dean muttered to himself.

Then, with absolutely no warning the guy slapped Dean so hard he saw stars.

“What the fuck, man?” Dean spat, fairly certain he was bleeding.

Castiel just stared at him blankly. “That is the purpose of the video, is it not?”

“Yeah but that was rude as - fuck it.” Dean said, slapping Cas as hard as he could.

Cas’s head didn’t even move, and Dean’s palm stung like a bitch.

Cas turned to look at Charlie. “I’ve fulfilled the requirements for your experi- oh.”

Dean may have just slapped him again. At least this time he got a response.

-

Gabe had to jump a little to slap Sam, but that only gave him more power behind his hits. Sam was nearing the end of his (hopefully) final growth spurt, and Gabe appeared to have not had one since he was fourteen.

“You big oaf-”

Oaf? Charlie mouthed at Gilda. Gilda just shrugged.

“Buffoon, ogre-”

“What am I, Shrek?” Sam said, leaning backwards just a bit to put his face out of slapping range so he could exact revenge.

-

Somewhere along the way slapping had devolved to fists and now Dean was panting as dragged Cas in by the tie to headbutt him.

Except he didn’t quite headbutt him and oops, now they were making out.

When they pulled back, gasping and desperate for air and Cas looking above allsurprised, Dean punched him in the face again.

But in a  _friendly_  way.

Charlie realized she may have been shipping the wrong couples.

**Author's Note:**

> on tumblr at [this gorgeous blog ;)](ang3lba3.tumblr.com)


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